Going Beyond Mindset
Why you must go beyond 'changing your thoughts' to truly heal
Recently I've been hearing from women who have reflected on the fact that even after lots of coaching, support, and mindset work they still experience fear and a sense of lack around money and worthiness at certain times. Sometimes (or a lot of the time) they wake up anxious, thoughts spinning, uncertainty following their every step.
Perhaps you have seasons in your life where all the personal development and the mindset shifts don't seem to work. In those moments, you may feel like you've done something wrong - because all of the "better thoughts" didn't "fix" you. Beloved you, life is life, and uncertainty and challenges arise. Nothing can protect you from that. But the work you've done will help you negotiate those times in your life with more skill and with more ease - and that, I believe is the real result we seek.
However, the other thing to remember is that mindset work often doesn't offer the level of healing we need when it comes to money, scarcity, and worthiness. In this week's love letter, let's talk about why we must go beyond mindset work to do deeper healing.
The wounds we carry go deeper than belief.
The beliefs we carry around money, scarcity, and worthiness are very often remnants of challenging childhood or young adult experiences. These experiences are frequently "little t" trauma (though it can be big T trauma, too) - the kind of experiences that leave you wounded and afraid, making an imprint on your body psyche. These trauma imprints manifest in our adult life as repetitive, negative thoughts about ourselves or behavior that in some way harms us or those around us.
Thought work won't do much.
Trying to do thought work to address money, scarcity, and worthiness when there are trauma imprints at play is like putting fresh paint on wood that is splintered and cracked. For the paint to "stick" and to look fresh, the wood must be treated - we have to get down to the wood that is not damaged and then paint.
Miraculously we are like that wood - the core, the essence, of who we are remains undamaged ready to be revealed. Our work is to process the trauma imprints - to feel, and honor, the part of us that is frozen in time and to reintegrate the energy. In my experience personally and with clients, there are so many modalities and approaches that support healing. I recommend working with the body (where the trauma imprints are held), working with energy and spiritual allies, and then working to update the narrative as healing (otherwise known as feeling and processing the experience) occurs.
Working with the body.
As basic as it may sound, exercise is a wonderful way to process held traumatic imprints - I am partial to kickboxing and strength training for this purpose. I also love and facilitate breathwork that unravels wounding the body holds. Yoga, and what I call micro-yoga practices, can support releasing the energy of past trauma from the body. We begin with the body and create space and time for the feeling to move through - note though, that it is so important to move at a slower pace than you may want to move. Moving slowly prevents retraumatizing yourself!
Working with energy and spirit.
Listen, we have access to incredible healing and supportive allies in the unseen realms. I love to encourage (and facilitate) active imagination and shamanic journey work to negotiate healing at the energetic and spiritual levels. I also love using energy medicine and also flower essences to support healing at the energetic level. Our nervous system does not distinguish between what we see/conjure in our imagination and what is real. The combination of somatic work with the energetic often leads to a new narrative emerging with ease.
Working with the mind.
As the imprints of trauma are released from the body and we utilize energetic and spiritual support, a new narrative often emerges spontaneously. However, this is the time to actively shape a narrative that supports the future we wish to create - a future informed by that core essence of wholeness that is more easily accessed once the imprints of trauma have been healed.
Personally, and in client work, I see that this work is not a one-time "fix". It is a gift, an ongoing practice of healing that we lean into as we evolve and grow. As we heal, new facets of our experience require our attention and care and that's not only okay, but it's celebration-worthy - to continue healing means that you are continuing to grow. That is a gift not only to you but to the world around you.
So now it's your turn - where have you experienced deep healing and what really moved the needle? I would love to know.