3 reasons you don't experience abundance
Abundance.
Merriam-webster tells me that the word abundance is in the top 1% of words that are searched. The official definition of abundance that Merriam-Webster gives us follows:
Definition of abundance
1: an ample quantity: an abundant amount: PROFUSION
a city that has an abundance of fine restaurants
2: AFFLUENCE, WEALTH a life of abundance
3: relative degree of plentifulness
low abundances of uranium and thorium— H. C. Urey
This word, this idea is the cornerstone of what the women I work with say they truly want.
An abundance of clients.
An abundance of clarity.
An abundance of love.
An abundance of experiences.
An abundance of money.
An abundance of safety.
An abundance of beauty.
In fact, take a moment right now (I'll wait, I promise) to write down what you want to experience in abundance.
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Take a moment with your list - some of the items on your list are likely things that you have experienced or are currently experiencing in your life. Some of the things on your list are things you are likely working toward or actively wishing were part of your life.
If there are things on your list that you are currently experiencing, do you stand in awe and gratitude that your life is so full and rich with exactly what you want? If there are things you are actively seeking, do your actions on a daily basis take you closer to that reality?
It's okay to be honest - if the answer is no, you are not alone.
Instead of potentially getting judgy with yourself, please be kind. You are human and in the western world, it is not unusual to have abundance, or have the ability to create abundance, and to not really experience it. So with compassion and curiosity, let's get real. There are three big reasons you don't experience abundance.
3 reasons you don't experience abundance
You have abundance but you don't receive it. This is what I lovingly refer to as my "inner hungry ghost". Hungry ghosts are a Buddhist concept of beings who are haunted by desires that cannot be sated. Their tiny mouths and huge stomachs create a perpetual longing that is never satisfied. I see this as an effect of the societal conditioning that there is (and we are) never enough. This conditioning elevates consumption as our main source of pleasure in western society.
On some level, you know that life is impermanent and you can't hold onto whatever abundance you have or want to have. This is a fundamental truth of being human and living on earth - to experience abundance means that you will necessarily experience the loss of that abundance. Go ahead and read that again - don't gloss over it. Honestly, western society mostly sucks at letting go and grieving our losses because it is a death of sorts. We hold on for dear life to youth, wealth, supremacy, esteem, etc., etc... However, our capacity to experience the rich, full abundance that we desire is predicated on our ability to welcome the loss and to grieve. This is where new visions and desires for abundance and nourishment for those visions, happens -- the dark quiet space of death.
'The other shoe might drop' syndrome. Completely unconscious, rooted in our Puritan legacy, this is the deep-seated fear that if things are too good, we will be punished, disliked, judged, or, or. This unconscious fear inspires us to hide and play small, disconnected from who we are and what we desire for ourselves and the world. This is the worst kind of superstitious behavior - the truth is that playing small will not protect us from anything except the joy and the challenges of creating the life and the world we wish to inhabit.
Choose your hard.
Challenging societal assumptions and healing our own scarcity wounding is tender (hard) work. However, one of my favorite phrases (I wish I knew where it originated) is you must choose your hard. Living in scarcity and not pursuing what you truly desire or denying yourself the experience of abundance, or not growing the business you want to build -- all of those things are hard. However, if these are the abundant experiences you want, it's debilitating to deny yourself just because it is challenging to heal and to say yes to the life you truly desire.
So please, sister, choose the hard that errs on the side of challenging the assumptions and narratives that keep you in a state of scarcity. For you, yes, but also for the world you wish to live in.